aura: anxious
audio: jimmy eat world - hear you me

quicksand.. i've heard bout it in a movie once.. one character feared of it.. coz everytime he's in a hard situation, he becomes more anxious, and the more he struggles, the more he fails..

i guess he's right.. a lot of us fear of it.. i've encountered it a couple lot of times in my life.. the more i struggle, the faster and the more it consumes me.. maybe it's better to just let things be when you're in one hell of a situation.. you can't control everything.. things change... most of the time, the more i struggle, the more things get worse and more complicated..

when your'e in it, the more you stay still, the more time it will need to consume you compared to when you're struggling... it could give you more time when you stayed still.. and just let things be the way they really are.. the way things should be..

sometimes, maybe it's best to just let things go..

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jimmy eat world

aura: excited
audio: jimmy eat world - kill

great band!!! great songs!!! they rock!!!

Well, you're just across the street
Looks a mile to my feet
I want to go to you
Funny how I'm nervous still
I've always been the easy kill
I guess I always will

Could it be that everything goes 'round by chance? (chance?)
Or only one way that it was always meant to be (be)
You kill me, you always know the perfect thing to say (hey hey, hey hey)
I know what I should do, but I just can't walk away

I can picture your face well
From the bar in my hotel
I wish I'd go to you
I pick up put down the phone
Like your favorite Heatmeiser song goes
It's just like being alone

Oh God, please don't tell me this has been in vain (vain)
I need answers for what all the waiting I've done means (means)
You kill me, you've got some nerve, but can't face your mistakes (hey hey, hey hey)
I know what I should do, but I just can't turn away

So go on love
Leave while there's still hope for escape
Got to take what you can these days
There's so much ahead
So much regret
I know what you want to say
(Know what you want to say)
I know it but can't help feeling differently
I loved you, and I should have said it
But tell me just what has it ever meant

I can't help it baby, this is who I am (am)
Sorry, but I can't just go turn off how I feel (feel)
You kill me, you build me up, but just to watch me break (hey hey, hey hey)
I know what I should do, but I just can't walk away

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aura: sleepy
audio: up dharma down - pag-agos

"aalis na ako kenneth.. part of who i am is because of you..."

ako din..... mae ann, nanghihinayang ako di tayo masyadong nag-uusap or nagkasama after high school..

"being friends, hindi naman kung gano kadalas magsama eh.. you know me better than anyone whose here right now...."

you're right.. still sayang..

good luck to you my friend.. i know you'll do great out there.. good bye for now..

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where did i go wrong?

aura: lazy mode
audio: the fray - how to save a life

nice song..

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

How to save a life
How to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

How to save a life

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new gallery

aura: sleepy
audio: none

ei! i just created an account with flickr.. found time to upload and share some of my photos.. hope you like them.. make sure to drop by every... once in a while ayt!!??

and oh, i'd still update my yahoo photo album..

here's my flickr url:

an please post some comments or suggestions.. i would really appreciate them.. thanks!
have a nice day!!!
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aura: confused
audio: jason mraz - mr. a to z

this was taken from the online chicken soup for the soul, way way back.. just thought it made a good point.. : )

Things Are Not Always Black or White

When I was in elementary school, I got into a major argument with a boy in my class. I have forgotten what the argument was about, but I have never forgotten the lesson I learned that day.

I was convinced that "I" was right and "he" was wrong - and he was just as convinced that "I" was wrong and "he" was right. The teacher decided to teach us a very important lesson. She brought us up to the front of the class and placed him on one side of her desk and me on the other. In the middle of her desk was a large, round object. I could clearly see that it was black. She asked the boy what color the object was. "White," he answered.

I couldn’t believe he said the object was white, when it was obviously black! Another argument started between my classmate and me, this time about the color of the object.

The teacher told me to go stand where the boy was standing and told him to come stand where I had been. We changed places, and now she asked me what the color of the object was. I had to answer, "White." It was an object with two differently colored sides, and from his viewpoint it was white. Only from my side was it black.

My teacher taught me a very important lesson that day: You must stand in the other person’s shoes and look at the situation through their eyes in order to truly understand their perspective.

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good news?

aura: monday blues mood
audio:simple plan - welcome to my life

it's monday again.. its 10 am and i'm at my office.. for the past 2 weeks, it seemed a lot of things had happened.. and things were kinda fast for me to take.. i had my 5 vacation in bantayan island, cebu.. it also gave me a chance to visit bohol once again.. this time i made sure that i enjoy every moment of my time spend when i travel or go to different places.. places i do not go normally.. the trip was a blast.. i enjoyed every spot, every food, every experience during the trip.. the beaches were wonderful, the food were fresh and great.. the people i'm with were fantastic.. and i happened to do my greatest obsession as of the moment.. haha! i was able to take some good shots/ pictures.. but i missed my family, my friends.. my officemates.. :)

hehe.. anyway.. after the vacation, i went to work already.. can't wait to give my pasalubong.. i was only able to buy a few pasalubong since i had quite too many expenses this past few weeks and in the coming days.. so i bought limited stocks only haha!

ok.. i know this should not be included in this post.. i mean it deserved a seperate post.. but i'm going to mention this here anyway.. after loads of fun last week, i received an email from our HR head, enumarating the employees who got promoted for the year.. i was lucky enough to be one of those employees.. to be honest.. i never expected anything like this would happen to me.. i mean, not here.. pero nanjan na. and i didn't know how to feel.. the people i know were very proud of me.. don't get me wrong, but i felt so blessed and thankful for this thing to come.. but personally, i still felt that something is still missing.. i kinda felt i didn't deserved it.. haha! crazy huh?! well i have my sentiments.. a few people close to me knows my story, and until now it's really hard to let them understand my status.. but i really thank those people who believe in me.. you believe in me in a way i do not or cannot...

waaah! let's stop the drama and conclude my post.. haha! so what's next? hmm let me see, i'm going to expect a lot of bills and expenses this coming weeks.. i'm also going to expect a lot of changes, especially in the office.. hmm what else? my dad's business is finally catching up.. i've been hearing good news from my mom and dad for the past few days.. that's great news for my dad.. i sure hope it continues.. well that's a lot of things for 2/3 weeks.. but whatever happens next, i'll try my best to enjoy every moment of it..

ps: i'll post the picture i've taken from our trip soon.. please check them out soon ok? take care everyone.. have a nice day! :)

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paradise - priceless

aura: wasted
audio: barbie almalbis - give yourself away



priceless feeling number one: being able to see and feel the happiness from the poeple you really care about... even just for moment..

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short of shorts

aura: wasted
audio: haley james scott - halo

just came home from our badminton game.. had a few sets with the people or, should i say with some of the bosses from my work..

i was thinking not to play tonight coz for one, the schedule was from 8 pm - 9 pm which was quite late.. secondly, i wasn't feeling healthy today.. my cough's killing me every now and then, i want to get plenty of rest and sleep.. tsk.. but then, i brought my stuff with me, just in case i changed my mind and decided to play.. which eventually i did.. hehe.. anyway.. at around 730 we started to change into our playing attire.. changed my shirt.. then i took off my pants.. after that, something struck my mind.. damn i thought i forgot my shorts.. i started to search my bag and yep, i was right.. haha! how stupid of me.. guess i was still half asleep when i was preparing my stuff this morning haha!

anyway, it was too late to back out.. so i still played.. hahahah! i don't want to describe the feeling, how it felt and, i don't want to experience it ever again.. hahaha! really stupid! anyway, i just looked at the brighter side.. at least it made me laugh for a while..

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aura: sleepy
audio: join the club - nobela

Dean: It must be rough, to believe in something so much and have it disappoint you like that.
Layla: You wanna hear something weird? I'm okay, really. I guess if you're going to have faith you can't just have it when the miracles happen, you have to have it when they don't.
Dean: So what now?
Layla: God works in mysterious ways. Goodbye Dean.
Dean: Hey, um, you know, I'm not much of the praying type. But I'm gonna pray for you.
Layla: Well, there's a miracle right there.

~taken from
supernatural - episode 12 - "faith"

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aura: sick
audio: lifehouse - sick cycle carousel

tropical storm just hit our country last thursday night.. it was the main reason why our puerto gallera trip was cancelled.. it's kinda weird, coz i have no idea that there was a storm coming. it suddenly rained last thursday night.. and caloy was suddenly here.. i didn't even hear anything about it from the weather forcast or news.. hehe! i'm not really sure what's going on in our world right now.. weird things just kept on happening.. storm in the middle of summer.. or maybe rainy season started early this year.. ah, la niƱa...

anyway, moving on.. ok, so the storm suddenly came, and last night i've decided to go for a swim.. hehe. crazy huh.. and to my surprise, the storm was a real one.. i mean, the wind was strong last night, all i could say was that "bagyo nga talaga to.. tsk!".. but it didn't stop us to take a few laps.. haha! really crazy..

o well.. i guess the storm just left our country today.. left a few families in griefs again.. i just hope that people should take nature more seriously.. you know, take care of mother nature.. coz it's really hard to survive when nature decided to take over.. ok i know i'm not making any sense anymore.. i just hope our cebu trip next next week turns out ok.. no delays, nice weather etc...

be safe everyone!

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cheezy volcano

aura: neutral
audio: none

just tried pizza hut's new cheezy volcano crust.. it tasted like heaven.. awsome!!!
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aura: sad
audio: none

it's been a while since the last time i went to have my id photo taken.. i had it last night and just claimed it this afternoon.. and to my surprise, i was a bit shocked and i think i was frozen for a time after seeing my own picture.. not that i looked bad nor i looked good.. it just felt.. weird.. felt like i didn't know myself for a while and then suddenly i just realized, i'm growing old..
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aura: sad
audio: james blunt you're beautiful

my father once told me that in the real world, there are no mirrors.. one cannot see his own reflection.. nor one can realize who they really are in the real world..

people, most of the time can have the slightest idea about the impact of their actions to other people.. i'm not sure if they expression "tell me who your friends are, and i will tell you who you are" has the same message or somehow tells the same idea.. but for me it does.. it's really hard to tell how your actions might affect other poeple.. besides, we are here in this world just to live, enjoy and experience what God gave us... learn from our mistakes and grow.. but sometimes we forget that we are not alone in this world.. we share it with others.. and with them, we get to know ourselves..

some poeple would say "i was made this way, i don't really care what others would say about me...." i'm afraid for me.. this statement is only applicable if you don't hurt/ affect others.. they say that your actions shape or identify you.. and sometimes, we cannot realize whether our actions are right or wrong easily.. one only do things what he thought or should do, and sometimes has the slightest idea if it's appropiate or not.. only other poeple can tell and judge whether your deeds are right or wrong..

no mirrors, no reflections in the real world.. there are some cases when we don't know ourselves anymore.. i, most of the times do things i want others to do to me.. but hey, nobody's perfect.. i sometimes do things i hate or don't want others to do to me.. like my father said, one cannot see or know oneself in the real world.. and it's true.. some people don't realize they are exactly who they hate.. they do exactly what they don't want others to do to them.. one of the irony of life i guess.. you may know what you want or hate, but what you don't realize is that you do exactly what you hated others would do to you..

and for that, i ask forgiveness for those who i've wronged and offended by my actions.. i would appreciate it if you tell me when i did something wrong.. and i especially thank those who are serves as my mirrors and allows me to see my own reflection..

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aura: still hot
audio: none

vanilla ice cream with strawberry, banana and, and chocolate syrup!
yum!!! :9

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aura: hot
audio: none

ang init!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

pinapawisan pa din ako kahit habang naliligo...

di na tumitigas yung ice cream sa freezer.... at hindi na siya malamig bago mo pa siya kainin..

sumasakit nalang ang ulo ko tuwing gumigising dahil sa init..

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good friday

aura: tired
audio: fall out boy - sugar, we're goin

for the past few years, i have been spending my holy week just staying in our home.. this year, i've decided to experience something new.. so i joined my mom and my dad to the procession of the black nazarene at quiapo.. they have been doing it twice a year.. every feast of the black nazarene and every good friday.. they were the only times the black nazarene of quiapo church is being brought out and being drawn around the area.. and believe me, from what i see in tv every year, i really hesitated to join my parents today. but my mom assured me that the crowd would be way too few compared to the crowd present during the feast.. she told me that during the feast, people from provinces would really come here to witness the statue of nazarene and be part of the feast.. this year's was a bit tragic coz a number of people were injured and some have died..

we got up early at around 3 am coz we still have to do some preparations.. they said that the nazarene would be brought out at 6 am.. we reached the destination at around 530 am knowing that the procession has already started.. we found out that the nazarene was brought out at 5 am.. the crowd was a whole lot calmer compared to what i witness in tv every year during the feast of the black nazarene.. but still for me the crowd is already huge.. groups of followers came to join the procession.. bringing thier own poon that also varied in saizes and way of carrying them.. some would carry it by groups, all on their shoulders.. it is evident how heavy some were carrying that one or two of them would have to guide in front.. push the group in order to stop when needed to stop.. and by the way.. majority of the crowd are bare footed.. but not us.. hehe..

anyway, so we walked towards the procession's directions in order to catch up and join the crowd.. i have to admit i was a bit dissapointed at first when we found out we were late.. it was my first time and i really would love to sea the black nazarene up close.. luckily one of us somehow know the path the procession would take so she led us the way.. and then there it was.. the black nazarene.. i couldn't describe the feeling i had when it passed by.. we weren't able to go any nearer.. but you could feel it's presence.. the way the crowd responded to it.. i had to admit it kinda gave me the creep.. i could feel my heart pounding.. the scene was pretty intense you could hear poeple shouting and i see the crowd throwing towels to the people with the black nazarene for them to wipe it then thrown back to the crowd, and i could imagine people trying to reach the black nazarene.. witnessing and experiencing this event made me feel kinda heavy yet refreshed.. happy yet lonely.. i just couldn't describe how i really felt at that moment.. but i believe i was relieved and felt proud of myself when i saw it..

so we were able to follow and continued with the procession.. the sun is up and started to become hot.. but we just continued.. we didn't follow the procession till the black nazarene was brought back to the church though.. we just stopped to one location and fled away.. hehe.. my mom said that we already reached the farthest point of the procession.. and the black nazarene shall be brought back to the church already.. but a lot of the crowd still went on..

and i guess i found it very interesting when i heard my mom telling someone that the black nazarene must be brought back to the church before 12 noon.. i really don't know why.. i didn't even bothered to ask.. also.. according to my dad.. the shorter the path which the black nazarene passes, the worse the sign becomes.. don't really know if this "omen" includes the entire world or only here in the philippines.. hehe.. and of course i took some photos.. hehe..

you could check them in my yahoo photo album. try to check the NEW!!! album..

hope everyone had a peace, relaxing and meaningful holy weekend... keep the faith.. and God bless everyone..

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toys for the big boys

aura: my head hurts
audio: nickelback - savin' me

The 2 Manila International Auto Show
April 06-09, 2006
World Trade Center
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looking back

aura: hot
audio: my chemical romance - the ghost of you

bohol is one of the spots here in the philippines populary known for its sites and beaches.. i'm proud that i could say i've been there.. stayed in a beautiful, in fact the most beautiful beach i've been to in my entire life.. whit it's super fine white sand and crystal clear water... it's a paradise in deed.. too bad those were the only things i've remembered..

i've been there when i was 12-14 years old.. that was a long time ago.. bohol wasn't even a popular place for it's beaches that time.. too bad when i think about it right now.. i can't remember me enjoying or appreciating that place at that moment.. haaay.. soooobrang sayang.. i guess i was too young to know or even realize where i was that moment.. and now.. i just wish i could turn back time and experience how great the feeling of being there again..

maybe that's one of the drawbacks of growing old huh.. there will come to a point where in you'd realize the things you've missed when you were younger.. and there's nothing you can do to turn it back.. or maybe there are ways.. but things would not be quite the same.. i mean i just have to work and earn for money in order for me to go back to bohol.. but i doubt the place would be exactly the same way when i was there 10 years ago..

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simple mind exercise

aura: sleepy
audio: the all american rejects - it ends tonight

i've decided to set my mobile phone's (which also serves as my primary watch) time setting to military time format in order to excercise my mind once in a while with simple math.. subtracting the time during the afternoon by 12 gives you the exact time in PM. eversince graduating i've used this time format believing that i could make use of my brain when i want to know the time..

what i just realized is that it could make huge effect, which i already did last friday, when i do my math wrongly.. the slightest mistake of 1 digit difference would mean an hour difference in time..

so 2245 = 1045 pm right? last friday i miscalculated and thought that it was only 945 pm.. tsk tsk..

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aura: dizzy
audio: none

just want to have a recap about the stuff that i told myself last year. about the things that i should keep in mind this year. well.. here are the following:

- post on my blog more often so that i could exercise my expression skills. ;)

- i was hoping that i could go out with my parents/ family more often. (take them to makati, libis, etc. places that they haven't been to.)
- save money. make sure to monitor my budget.
- start to plan/ or think what i really want to do with my life. hehe!
- to watch WWE Raw Live here in manila! i already got the tickets.. it's going to be on february 24, 2006 @ araneta coliseum. God! i can't wait for this day to come.. hehe! it's actually in my list of things i want to do before i die...
- clean my room/ stuff more often..
- help or contribute to my dad's business..
- read at least one book per month.. so that should be 12 or more books next year! i think i only finished 3 or 4 books this year.. tsk tsk.. too bad...

well it's clear that i'm not doing the first one.. after all this time, i only posted one entry since january 2006.

with regard to the second supposed resolution, it is not happening.. we all have a tight budget.. we're having huge problems with my dad's business. but we are still able to go out and spend time with each other especially when my dad's here in manila.. we are still able to go out and have lunch, or dinner sometime.. but not in those areas that i've stated above..

i just started to save and monitor my budget once in a while so i guess that's one thing i'm accomplishing.

as for the fourth one.. sad to say that i still have no plans.. still have no directions.. but don't get me wrong.. it's not that i'm not thinking or planning anything.. it's just that.. as of now, i'm still kinda going with the flow..

i'm proud to say that i've accomplished the fifth one.. we had a blast and really did enjoy the WWE Raw Live Tour show.. the experience was totally awsome.. and until now i couldn't find the words to express how great this experience really was..

anyway.. as for the last 3 things/ stuff that i told myself to keep in mind this year.. haaay.. nope.. i'm afraid they are not being fulfulled.. tsk tsk..

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funny tummy

aura: sick :(
audio: gavin degraw - belief

yesterday i had the worst experience of stomach pain.. can't really explain what caused it.. and i don't have any idea what was it.. i think it's sort of a hyper acidity or ulcer attack? i'm not really sure.. but the pain is severe and i know i really looked stupid/ funny or parang timang everytime i experience the pain.. namimilipit ako sa sakit twing sumasakit siya.. i didn't expect it would be very painful.. my tummy just felt funny the whole morning.. in the afternoon.. i started to feel the pain.. pain i thought i could ignore at first.. then it didn't stop.. it just kept gettin worse.. so i've decided to leave work early.. when i'm about to leave our building and took the elevator.. i suddenly felt dizzy.. good thing the elevator stopped at 7th floor.. i was hoping some of my officemates were still there having their break.. luckily they were.. i found them and told them i felt dizzy.. i think i almost passed out.. anyway.. they saw me, gave me medicine.. and were kind enough to offer me a ride home.. i really am very thankful.. hated my body coz it failed me again.. it's true what people say.. as you grow older, your body's gonna give you signs of you gettin old and it's gonna need a lot of repairs.. life..

anyway.. i'm sick today, didn't go to work.. i only ate bread last night.. yesterday.. i've got no appetite at all i did't eat.. well a few bites of hotdog.. this morning i had few slices of bread again.. but i was able to eat rice for lunch.. that's it.. i also have fever right now.. and nanghihina pa ako..

haaay.. i want to go to work tomorrow.. sana kaya na ng katawan ko.. :D

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sent from above

aura: sleepy
audio: itchy worms - akin ka nalang

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